When you experience a loss of any kind, there is always something that you hold onto. Whether it be a photo, letter, t-shirt, etc. There is always that one thing that is going to remind you of a special time, place, or person.
I’ve been on my weight loss journey since January 4th. Here we are August 12th, and I am having a problem with letting go. Letting go of what you ask? Well, I have yet to clean out my closet and dresser drawers to get rid of the clothes that no longer fit due to them being too big. I know that once I do decide to let go, my closet and dresser are going to look rather bare. I actually had a dream that someone went into my closet and removed all of the bigger clothes. I freaked out because my favorites were gone, and there were dresses in there that I just wasn’t ready to get rid of. I remember waking up, getting out of bed, opening the closet door, and being so happy that it was only a dream.
I cannot even begin to tell you how many articles of clothing I own. Right now, there are only a handful of things that fit the way they are supposed to. One thing is for sure though, there is not one piece of clothing in there that is too small. As a matter of fact, I need to go shopping to buy some stuff that actually fits without me having to fold the waistline over just to keep them from falling down. My dress shirts swallow me up, and the t-shirts are really big. Some of my most favorite dresses hang too low in the front and on the sides, and if I choose to wear them, I have to wear an undershirt or something with them to not expose parts of my body. LOL Sad, I know……
Then there is the decision of donating the stuff or trying to sell it to make some money to buy new stuff. I know that there are plus sized women who would rock the dresses I have, and they’d look awesome in the skirts, jeans, and shorts that are feeling neglected right about now.
Why am I so afraid to let it all go? I know that I don’t plan on going back to where I was before. I’ve come so far, and I do not want to take any steps back. I’ve lost 95 pounds, and I’m not done just yet.
I have favorite t-shirts from special moments in my life. I can’t see myself parting with a few. I will keep them to sleep in since my gowns and night shirts are just way too big.
So, here’s to letting go…. I’ve let go of 95 pounds, and I don’t want them back, so why can’t I part with the clothing to go along with it? I’m going to pray for peace to help me start the process of letting go.